NATIONAL SURVEILLANCE MAGAZINE


Life On The Line

A Private Investigators Journal

The phone rang. What could it be? A case? I could only hope. I picked the phone up on the second ring. I don't know why, just a force of habit.

"What? I say.
"Is this..." a woman's voice nervously starts.
"If it ain't you've just wasted a quarter," I say as I lit a smoke.
"Are you free?"
"Only for dinner," I spat out.
"Good, I'll be expecting you at seven." The phone went dead.

It was my mother. She always calls on Wednesday.
I got out of bed, it being eleven thirty and all, poured a drink, ahhhhh, freshly squeezed cranberry juice and vodka. I forgo my weekly shower and turned on the television.
There's a sudden knock on the door. I ran to get my gun, hidden in the cats litter box, and walk over to the door.
"Who the hell is it," I growled.

"Who do you want," the voice answered in a monotone.
"Wildwest, Nomoreexcues, and Standpat." I answered back as I heard footsteps walking away.

Thank heavens my bookie came by to take my horse bets.
What a day. I'm tuckered out.

By VIC STEED


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DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A TOUGH GUY?

Read the questions below and see if you get the right answers.

Do you know why you kick someone when they're down?
Do you wear a black overcoat in the summer?
Do you wear short pants in public?
Can you escape from seemingly impossible situations?
Do you know someone in every branch of government that can help you get information while you never have to return the favor?
Does your bartender know the pulse of the city?
Do you enjoy a couple of cocktails after a hard day of crime solving?
Do you know when it's in your best interest not to shoot your mouth off?

Answers:
Because it's easier than punching
Yes
No
Yes
Yes
Yes
Definitely Yes
No
If you have answered any of these questions wrong, sorry you ain't no tough guy. Furthermore, of you admit to answering any of these questions wrong, you might as well give up on ever being a tough guy.


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